Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Narrative about Life In Auckland vs Syria

I dragged myself out of bed and got ready to go to school. Before I went to school, I had brushed my teeth, washed my face, got changed and made my lunch. After all of that I jumped in the car and was on my way to school.

I was awaken by a gust of cold air. Our house didn’t have any insulation so our house was always cold. Goose bumps covered my body. I heard gunshots and people screaming in horror. This happened everyday, but there was nothing I could do about it. Staying in bed until it was over was what I decided to do.

At lunchtime we ate our lunch and went outside to play, enjoying the sunshine. I could hear sounds of happiness and people laughing. It was also a good time to catch up with friends.

It was now lunchtime and my stomach was grumbling and growling like tigers. The only thing that was going through my mind was the thought of food and what my mum and siblings were eating. Or if they were eating. “Why did life have to be so hard” I thought to myself?

I got dressed into my pajamas and jumped into my warm cozy bed.” Goodnight” my Mum whispered after closing the door. I said a little prayer and then shut my eyes. Today had been a great day and I was so thankful to have such a great life.

Night had fallen. I had nowhere to sleep because so many people lived in our house. The only place free was by the door that had fallen down. The last time I slept there I felt like I was in a freezer. I moved closer towards my mother and used her body heat to keep me warm. Tonight would be another sleepless night, just like every other night in Syria.


  1. Hey Ashleigh,

    Auckland really is a peaceful place to live compared to syria isn't it? You've shown that well in your writing :)

    Watch out for repeating your self, can you find different ways of saying things? Try changing them a noun after you've already told us what 'it' is.

    Keep writing :) Mr. Hutchings

  2. Hey Ashleigh! My name is Kaley. I'm a student at the University of South Alabama in Mobile, Alabama in the United States of America taking a class titled EDM 310.

    I’m so sorry you had to experience such terrible living situations in Syria, but I’m so happy that you were able to leave that horrid place to now live where you are most joyful! Even though difficult times are unpleasant they always help us to be much more thankful than we ever could’ve been about the wonderful parts of life. The way you interchanged between the settings of your previous home and your new home with each detail kept your story very well organized! You used several intriguing adjectives to express emphasis of your narrative and it was a highly enjoyable story to read! Great job! Keep up the good work!

    If you'd like to visit my blog please click here!


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.